What If...
Dear YOU,
what if this was your last day on earth, would you have any regrets?
I have been asked if I had any regrets in my life a handful of times, and I feel very fortunate that I have always been able to answer this with: “Not even one.”
You've probably heard Mark Twain's saying:
“We regret the things that we don't do, more than the things we do.”
Without realizing it, this has been my life motto. Once my heart was (and still is) set on something (or someone), there's no turning back. That's the path I'm taking, regardless of others' opinions and even consequences. Thankfully, my parents always had my back, even when my choices weren't their preferred ones for me. Their ability to “let me be me” and their trust in my decision making process is why I was able to stay the course when my heart was pulling me into the craziest of directions. It is also why, I have an easier time understanding my inner compass.
Embracing Your True Nature
"You are so stubborn" - a phrase I've heard countless times. Now, understanding my human design chart, it all makes sense. With my "Left Angle Cross of Individualism," I'm here to stand up for the things and people I believe in. Yes, I'm stubborn - I'm meant to be. But I've had to learn to be stubborn for the right things and fight for the right people.
This is where our inner authority comes into play. Each of us has a unique way of making these "What is really right for me?" decisions. It's ingrained in our DNA, providing an inner compass that communicates differently within each person.
Understanding Your Inner Authority
Your inner authority is like your personal GPS for life decisions. For some, it's a short, subtle nudge (Splenic Authority). For others, it's clarity that unfolds over time (Emotional Authority). In my case, with my Ego/Heart Authority, it feels like I'm turning into a "rainbow shooting out of your chest" care bear - overwhelming, all-encompassing, loving, passionate, blissful, and peaceful all at once. When I feel this in my heart, and I followed my strategy (more on that later) my choice is made, and I'm pursuing it come hell or high water!
But here's the thing: your inner authority isn't just about making decisions. It's about staying true to yourself in a world that's constantly trying to shape you into something else. Let's pause for a moment and consider this: From your first breath to your last, who's the one constant companion on your life journey? It's you, isn't it? Just you. So when it comes down to it, you're the only one you truly need to answer to.
Living your life to please others or making choices that don't align with your core? That's a surefire recipe for a heart full of regrets. It's like trying to wear shoes that don't fit - you might look good for a while, but eventually, you'll end up with blisters and sore feet.
Now, I'm not saying we should ignore everyone else's feelings or needs. Not at all! We're all interconnected, and our decisions impact those around us. But at the end of the day, if you're not being true to yourself, you're doing a disservice to both you and the people around you. It's like trying to pour from an empty cup - it just doesn't work.
So, how do we balance this? By tuning into our inner authority and using it as a guide. When you make decisions that resonate with your true self, you're not just avoiding regrets - you're creating a life that feels authentically yours. And ironically, when you're living authentically, you often end up being of greater service to others too. You're operating from a place of fullness rather than depletion.
A Simple Yet Powerful Decision-Making Process
I've found a simple German phrase incredibly helpful in my decision-making process:
"WILL ich das?" (Do I WANT this?)
"Will ICH das?" (Do I want this?)
"Will ich DAS?" (Do I want THIS?)
This simple sequence helps you:
Identify if you truly WANT something: This first step is about connecting with your deepest desires and motivations. It's not about what you think you should want or what seems logical, but what resonates with your core being. Your inner authority plays a crucial role here. For me, with my Ego Authority, it's that overwhelming, blissful feeling in my heart. For you, it might be a gut feeling, a sense of clarity, or a physical sensation. The key is to tune into your unique way of knowing and let it guide you beyond surface-level wants.
Determine if it's something YOU want, not what others want for you: This step helps you differentiate between your authentic desires and external influences. We're often swayed by societal expectations, family pressures, or the desires of those close to us. By emphasizing 'YOU', this question prompts you to check if your want aligns with your values and life path, not someone else's. It's about honoring your individuality and recognizing that what's right for others may not be right for you. Your inner authority can help here too, as it often reacts differently to authentic desires versus those imposed by others.
Assess if THIS specific thing is what you need, or if you're seeking external solutions for internal imbalances: This final step encourages you to look deeper at the nature of your want. Sometimes, we desire external things or experiences as a way to fill internal voids or address unresolved issues. For example, you might think you want a new job, when what you really need is more creativity or recognition in your life. By questioning if 'THIS' specific thing is what you truly need, you open yourself to exploring alternative solutions that might better address your core needs. Your inner authority can provide valuable insights here, helping you distinguish between surface-level wants and deeper needs.
Your inner authority can provide insights into all these aspects, while your mind might mislead you with convincing but misaligned reasons.
Dealing with Past and Potential Regrets
Rather than dwelling on past regrets, focus on what you can change now. If there's something you regret and CAN do something about, that's where your energy should go. Use your inner authority to guide your actions.
One thing I’d like to point out here: Even correct decisions can change over time. The key is to keep checking in with yourself and fine-tuning your ability to hear, see, feel, sense, taste, and/or smell your intuition aka inner authority. This ongoing process of self-awareness and alignment with your inner authority is crucial to living a life without regrets.
Discovering Your Unique Inner Authority
If you're curious about your individual inner authority, start by understanding your Human Design Type and strategy. This knowledge will help you recognise and apply your inner authority effectively. I have attached a video in which I explain the types and strategies. For more insights on your own inner authority, check Jovian Archive or book a 1:1 "Introduction to Human Design Reading" with me for personalised guidance.
In the end, living without regrets isn't about never making mistakes. It's about making choices that align with your true self, learning from your experiences, and continuously growing. By tuning into your inner authority and making decisions that resonate with your core being, you're more likely to look back on your life with satisfaction rather than regret.
So, if today were your last day on Earth, would you have any regrets? With practice and self-awareness, you too might be able to one day say, "Not even one." Thats my wish for you.
Regret can only consume you if you don’t experience the things you want or if you hold on to feeling bad about what happened.
Therefore: follow your inner compass into the correct experiences and learn to grow from the bad ones.
